"Its a baby girl!"
Doctors told me. From that moment till the moment they showed me her face, that wait felt like an eternity. When I saw her face, all I could think, she's beautiful and she's mine.... The most beautiful thing I have ever seen. I was over the moon, I had my c-section in the morning but I insisted she to be on my side (not in the crib) all day. I could not sleep in the day, neither in the night for I was so paranoid that something might happen to her. The entire experience was overwhelming!! Slowly and surely the routine set in and I was busy feeding her (like half of the day!! ;)), changing her nappies and what not. I also got busy caring for my own body and working towards recovery.
In the entire process, I almost forgot to let the experience and the change of having a baby sink in. I practically had no time. But then one fine day, I was looking at my daughter sleeping so peacefully and before I knew tears were rolling down my cheek and I just could not stop crying. All I could say was, "God, she's so cute!". I felt so vulnerable at that moment as if my heart has been ripped from my body in the form of my baby and is out for anybody to hurt. I could not help but think that I cannot let anything happen to my baby. I knew that I am to experience plethora of emotions I never knew before, the fears I never had, the happiness like never before and what not! I never felt so vulnerable yet happy at the same time. Its the feeling I have been struggling to put in words, this is the best I could come up with. But that day I realised what its like to be a mother. And I promised myself and my daughter that I will be there for her always no matter what and that I will never let anything happen to her always!
This image aptly describes what I felt:
Being mother changes you in so many ways! I wont trade this feeling for anything in this whole wide world!
Btw my husband had good laugh looking at my cry for no reason. He took a picture of me crying and still makes a point to tease me about the same ;) :P
