Show me their faces, I demand!

Sigh, we are slapped with “yet another” gang-rape. And it enrages me deeply, so intensely, beyond all possible explanations. I just feel so vulnerable and I know each woman in this country shares this emotion with me. So what do I do about it, I try and avoid reading or writing about it, I didn't read news-papers for a few days after such incidents. Even otherwise if I see any mention of rape I turn blind eye on that news. I pretend that its not affecting me, I am still the fearless Komal I knew, I am still “free” and woman of 20^th century who can achieve anything a man can and be the way she wants to be and go where she wants to go and when she wants to.

I assume the plan has worked out fine for me until  one fine day I have a face-off with my pretension. While me and my husband are hiking on a nearby hill, he said “Lets be adventurous” and suggested we climb down the hill from the road less taken from a forest patch. For the fear of not being looked at unadventurous and fattu I reluctantly agreed. All the 20-30 minutes that we were climbing down I was on lookout all the time, the lookout was not for I might encounter snake or reptile or wild animal for that matter. I was on lookout was for the most dangerous of all animals…human. And I realized what became of me…a woman who cannot even climb down a silly hill without the fear of being “gang-raped” for that matter. Paralyzed…concerned…afraid…fattu… that’s what has become of me. Funny enough I cannot even trust what seem to be school going boys. Even the “so-called” minors are capable of such horrendous act. Irony, how can they be called bloody “minors “ if they are capable of doing what they did….

And why don’t I feel afraid, I have no one I can trust. When those, the protector of society, the police don’t think even once before asking questions like “what was that girl doing there” as if being and walking free is only the birth right of men. I just wanted to be adventurous, use my birth right of freedom… but such answers won’t be good enough for them. And why do I feel safe when even I hear news of the police gang raping women in their custody. You know what, I don’t even know which side I would prefer to go if I have “gang-rapists” on one side and “police” on another. I honestly don’t know the answer.

No offence meant here, I know good police men exist, just like good men exist but how am I to trust one…please answer me. And on top of it, you hide faces of such devils. I see TV hoping I get to see what such devils look like. I want to look in their eyes and see what cruelty lies in there. I want to see because I want to remember that look and hopefully identify the “rapist” category of people and beware of them. I would like to believe that they are not normal human beings. They cannot be normal looking human beings, can they? How is one of us capable of such hideous act! Just the thought of the act run shivers down my spine. How can they? No, they cannot be normal looking human beings. They must be having those devilish red eyes, or the horns coming out of their head. I want to believe so and I want to verify that, show me their faces, I demand. 

Alas… I know I would be disappointed… I know they are no different… I know they look like one of us…however hard it is for me to believe but I know they are unidentifiable…they don’t stand out, they are simply one of us! There is no way I can identify them…and possibly protect myself. They can be anytime, anywhere ready to pounce on any of us the moment they get the chance…. That saddens me beyond anything…. I am not safe…I am not free…I can trust NO ONE!

And why they have the privilege of hiding their face. They don’t deserve it! Their face need to be seen by everyone and I say why only face, they must be brought in public and should be paraded naked for that matter! Should they not be given the same treatment they gave to the poor helpless girl…. I know this is not going to happen in this “democratic” country. But the only way to control these animals is to imbibe fear in them and many others in their category. I don’t think we can imbibe “respect for women” in them by any means. No ways, for their act and their mentality, this seems to be a far-fetched idea to me! They should be treated as the act they did, like animals. I think even animals must be feeling ashamed for being compared to these devils.

I have stopped thinking why they do this, its beyond me to justify or reason such acts. I don’t care what and when stringent laws would be implemented and followed for that matter. All I want to feel is “safe”, all I want to be is “free”. All I want is not to worry for my mother, sisters, aunts, daughters…if they would reach home safely every day. All I want is peace of mind. How long do I wait before I get it…..